Recap 5.10 True Blood “Gone Gone Gone”

Tara: “Please, you gotta help me. I don’t know nothin’ about birthin’ no baby vampires.”

Home run. If you’re going to write out a long-running character, this is how you do it.

With the possible exception of turning him into a vampire (and I’d hate that), there really is nowhere for Hoyt as a character to go.  As he himself recounted, his mama smothers him, his “Cheeto-headed tramp” of a girlfriend cheated on him with his best friend, and there’s nothing for him in Bon Temps any more. I completely get why he chose to do what he did.  But when Jessica was glamouring Hoyt while telling him so very gently what a terrific guy he was, as an upset Jason looked on, I could not stop crying.  Jason crying in Sookie’s arms later on got to me, too.  Fare thee well, Hoyt Fortenberry.

(At least I hope that they didn’t write him out so beautifully, only to keep him in the show!)

I am also loving Sam and Luna running around detecting in a variety of animal forms on Emma’s trail — this time, as white mice.  They’re closing in.  It’s only a matter of time now that they’ve infiltrated Authority.

And I hope they still have allies there.  Jessica is certainly an ally (and she’s still welcome at Merlotte’s), but something happened with Eric and Nora and their vision of Godric getting torn to pieces by Lilith.  This whole Authority take-over-the-world plot has gone on too long and is starting to bum me the heck out.  I really wanted Bill to be faking it, but he’s not, is he?  And Eric is under Lilith’s spell, too, now, isn’t he?  Did he really, really, really forgive Russell for killing his family?  Is that even possible?  Is Jessica next with the Lilith brainwashing?  And why did Molly have to die?  I liked Molly, and how unfair that she got it with one of her very own IStakes.  Aww.

Maybe I just hate how long Sookie and Eric have been separated, which has been pretty much the entire season.  Although I am indeed enjoying Sookie finally connecting so strongly with Jason.  The murder plot is sort of lame, but I loved that Jason has gotten so good as a detective that he realized there was more under the bed. Apparently, back in 1702, one of the Stackhouses sold their first fae-bearing female heir to M. Warlow, whoever that it is, and it turned out to be Sookie.  That sort of makes sens… well, not really, but this is a show about vampires, werewolves, shapeshifters and fairies, after all, so it does make show sense.

And Russell is finally showing his true colors.  It’s still all about the daywalking.  He wants to synthesize fairy blood.  The striptease fairies have been right all along.

Finally, who freaking knew I would love Tara and Pam together so much?  Tara using Ginger to trick and behead the new sheriff was my second favorite scene in the episode (after the one with Jessica glamouring Hoyt).  Pam is now ready to take Tara and leave Fangtasia forever, and how cool is that?  I think that now that she’s adjusted, Tara has become someone Pam can actually live with and care about.  Cool.

Lots of bits and pieces:

— The episode title, “Gone, Gone, Gone”, reminds me just a little of the season premiere, “Turn! Turn! Turn!”.  Gee, I don’t know why.

— Loved the news flash on TBBN labeled “Vampire Crisis — Night 3!”

— Mike Spencer was turned by vampires unknown and turned up to suck more than Sookie’s toes.  Good thing she’d ordered Chinese food instead of pizza.  That scene, ending with Sookie sitting in a pile of grue, just struck me funny.  Alas for poor Mike Spencere.

— Jason looked under a teddy bear’s skirt. 🙂

— Very nice that Sookie and Jason found a linguistics expert, even though he proved unable to decipher fairy code.

— Andy Bellefleur has gotten cool.  This is the cool Andy season.  I like him with Holly, too; they’re a cute couple.  Unfortunately, Marella the 500 year old fairy seduced him last season and now she’s very pregnant.

— Russell’s speech to the Authority was so impassioned that old, weird accents started creeping in.  Nice touch.

— Claude and his many sisters are 130 years old.

Quotes:

Steve: “Oh my fucking God, I’ve never actually seen a vampire get staked before! That was awesome!”

Andy: (about the chopsticks) “Well, that’s a stroke of luck. Good thing you didn’t order pizza.”

Andy: (re: Mike) “Man loved his job.”
Sookie: “He wanted to suck on my toes.”
Andy: “He kept autopsy photos on his computers same place he kept his porn.”
Sookie: “Ooh, no.”
Andy: “Yep.”
Sookie: “Suddenly I don’t feel so bad.”
What an epitaph for Mike, huh?

Pam: “No. We procreate because we want to. Not because some dickhead dipped in afterbirth told us to.”

Sookie: “If it doesn’t mean anything, why would anyone bother writing it down?”
Prof: “Why does my ex-wife name her toes? Maybe it’s a joke. Maybe ’cause she’s nuts.”

Andy: “I don’t say this to many men, but I love you.”

Loved it. Three out of four Butterfly McQueens,

Billie Doux

(Billie Doux and her contributing writers review science fiction, fantasy and cult television shows at BillieDoux.com.)