Friday Five: Humorous Sookie Sayings from Season 4

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Sookie had some great lines this past season, and with Anna Paquin’s feisty skills and snarky deliveries, she made me laugh more than once. Most of them are directed at Eric, which makes them even funnier. These are my Friday Five humorous quotes from The Sook.

  1. “Do you think my legs are going to magically open for you?” Sookie totally has Eric pegged. I love it when she calls him out!
  2. “There’s big gators in there you crazy viking, get on out and let’s go home before one of them chomps off your you-know-what!” I found it interesting that Sookie was so concerned about Eric’s ‘you-know-what’.
  3. “You can’t have any more. There isn’t any more. You drank the whole fairy and you’re going to your room!” Sookie is what, five-foot-nothing? Yet here she is, telling this giant, 1000 year-old, vampire to go to his room. Priceless!
  4. “Alcide, stop making that noise. Eric, put up those fangs and do what I say.” The funniest part about this line is that they BOTH OBEYED HER! Brilliant!
  5. “For a bad-ass werewolf, you drive like a girl.” Sookie said this one to Debbie Pelt and it just hit my funny bone.
Now it’s your turn! Tell us your favorite funny quotes from Sookie in the comments below.

Over-night fan (almost literally) of the Sookie Stackhouse series since early 2008. Co-owner of Anxiously anticipating season 6.


  1. Sookieeleana

    October 14, 2011 at 12:22 pm

    Yep, they are all classic ones. The Gator scene with Eric and Alcide is one of my favorite TB scenes ever. I also loved it when she discovered Eric’s cubby in her house, not so much what she said as the way she said it, she just can’t wait to rush over to Fangtasia and have another sexy argument with him about it. Here’s hoping we get plenty more Eric/Sookie sexy sparring next year.

    Could you do a Pam one some time? I know she uses bad words but she always has the best lines.

    • Maegan

      October 19, 2011 at 3:27 am

      “Lets go stare at ourselves in the mirror” one of my most favorite Pam lines ever!! ^.^ I would love to see a Pam lines post too!

      • Liz

        October 19, 2011 at 11:42 am

        Yeah, that’s great and I’ll keep it in mind when I get around to doing Pam quotes. But this is Sookie’s thread so….

  2. Cha

    October 14, 2011 at 6:19 pm

    Oh yes yes yes I was lmao when she said Alcide stop making that noise. I also cracked up whe. She called Bill ” your excellencey” it was that southern draw & look on her face when she said it. It was as if she was Saying you? A king? What a joke. There are a few more I’ll be back with later, I gotta go be a mommy right now. Good thread Liz… As Always.

  3. Jules

    October 14, 2011 at 7:06 pm

    Really enjoying the Friday Five! Lots of fun! I liked when Sookie was at a loss as to what to call Bill and just said, ” My Bill “. I also liked the scene when Sookie discovered Eric’s cubby and cursed, (granted Sookie has cursed before but it always sounds odd to me. ) This moment was w/ so much feeling. Lol.

  4. CassyM

    October 15, 2011 at 8:04 am

    Those are great – definitely Fairy Sookie talking. We like it when she comes out.

  5. Natasha

    October 15, 2011 at 3:22 pm

    How about the qoute “Psychopathic frat boy!…” Sookie says that upon finding a glass full of blood in the refrigerator just to show that Eric has settled his self in her house. I laughed so hard when I heard that and then more when Eric was under the spell, all of his clothes look like what a psychopathic frat boy would wear…lol.

  6. Nothinbutjoy

    October 20, 2011 at 1:32 pm

    I’m surprised the “I propose the two of you be mine” line isn’t on the list, but the ones you picked were really funny!


    Sookie had so many good lines this season!